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Parenting with Self-Compassion

by | Sep 18, 2024 | Growing the Good, Parenting, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

Practical Tips and Personal Stories – A conversation with Dr. Christine Lathren

 

Hello Friends,

As you know, intergenerational self-compassion is my greatest passion. So I am SUPER excited to share with you my fifth podcast episode with Dr. Christine Lathren on Parenting with Self-Compassion. I love our conversation because it feels so real, including a discussion of:

  • Perfectionism in parenting
  • Letting go of the lie that we can control outcomes if we do everything “right”
  • Not taking things personally
  • Being there for ourselves during our kids’ difficult moments.
  • How stress plus self-compassion builds resilience
  • What the research says about the power of self-compassion and the power of being part of a community who shares our struggles

We discuss how self-compassion can transform not only our lives, but our whole family, as well as practical tips for what this looks like in parenting and in all of our relationships. Christine Lathren is an MD, researcher, and mom of two boys. You can listen to this episode of the We Are in It Together podcast in your favorite podcast app, on Substack, or on YouTube.

I am also excited for next week’s blog, which will include info about how to order the first volume of my workbook for kids, as well as a free Masterclass on Helping Kids with Difficult Thoughts and Feelings for everyone who orders my book on October 24, 2024 launch date. I will also share updates on how to access an excerpt of the book for free, and of course there will be the full cover reveal :)))…..

This has been a busy week for me as I have four classes that start this week. There are still open spots in the Compassionate Parenting course and the Parent-Child Mindfulness and Self-Compassion class. My parent-child class that starts on Thursday includes both girls and a handful of young boys, so it should be a lively course! I love it!

Wishing you the gifts of mindfulness and self-compassion,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. My younger daughter, Anjali, had her first mountain biking race this past weekend. My greatest joy was listening to my older daughter help Anjali develop positive affirmations and a growth mindset to get through the race. Intergenerational self-compassion at its finest!! <3

Jamie-Lynn's daughter Anjali on the mountain bike, competing in her first race.

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© 2024 Jamie Lynn Tatera | All Rights Reserved

Own Your Fierce

by | Sep 12, 2024 | Mindfulness, Parenting, Resilience, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

The world needs your strength!

 

Question: Which of the following is an act of compassion: 1) Soothing someone who has been injured; 2) Setting a boundary to prevent further injury; or 3) Taking action that aligns with your values?

The answer is that all three are acts of compassion. The first example is tender, and the other two involve fierce compassion.

I was watching the debate last night, and I was reminded of how much the world needs people (especially women) who can fully own fierce compassion. The world needs each of us to complement our tenderness with caring force.

In my work with children, I use the character (Super) Snuggles to teach about the two sides of kindness: strong and gentle. This page from volume 1 of the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids shows examples of tender and fierce self-compassion phrases. Notice how some phrases can be either gentle or strong, depending on how you say them. Can you identify some phrases that you would like to hear when things go wrong?

The Gentle and Strong Self-Compassion Activity from the book Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids.

Kids sometimes ask whether Snuggles and Super Snuggles are two different characters, or the same character. The “Kids Team” made this playful 1-minute video to help us understand that kindness is kindness, whether it is gentle or strong.

I encourage everyone, including you, to learn to treat yourself with both tender acceptance and strong support. Growing your own self-compassion can provide a foundation for empowering and comforting others.

Next week I will offer a host of self-compassion-related classes, including Fierce Self-Compassion, Mindful Self-Compassion, Compassionate Parenting, and Parent-Child Mindfulness and Self-Compassion. Taking a class on your own or with your child can do wonders for increasing both tender and strong internal support (as well as the parent-child bond!).

If you are interested in learning to teach self-compassion to children (or learning more about the parent-child course), I am offering an intro session tomorrow. The free intro session includes information about the parent-child class as well as details about the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion for Children and Caregivers (MSC-CC) teacher training pathway.

Remember, your own self-kindness provides a foundation for supporting youth. The world needs both your tender support and your caring strength, as do you!

With love,

Jamie Lynn

Image of two bunnies representing gentle and strong self-compassion.

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A Map to Well-Being

by | Sep 11, 2024 | Growing the Good, Mindfulness, Parenting, Resilience, Self-Compassion, Sensitive Children | 0 comments

16 skills to get (your kids) there!

Hello Friends!

Today I’m sharing a map of sixteen skills that can help you and your kids be your most resilient, authentic and loving selves! One of my favorite aspects of the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbooks for Kids is the quest element. The Quest for Self-Compassion map provides a playful way for kids to move through 16 lands that contain 64 engaging mindfulness and self-compassion-boosting activities.

The book is being prepared for publication as I write this, and we plan to have the first volume available for preorder later this month (late September 2024). I am so, so, excited to share this book with you and the children you care about!

Here’s a map of the 16 Lands:

The Quest for self-compassion map to move through 16 lands that contain 64 engaging mindfulness and self-compassion-boosting activities.

The first volume contains activities and comics from the first 8 Lands: Connection, Freedom, Mindfulness, Acceptance, Sensations, Curiosity, Friendship and Kindness. I’ve shared with you excerpts from the Land of Connection and Freedom in previous blogs. In an upcoming newsletter, I plan to share an excerpt from the Land of Friendship.

All of the adventures in volume one create a foundation for practicing mindfulness and self-compassion. Children learn to:

  • Playfully practice mindfulness through noticing sights, sounds, and body sensations (critical skills for self-regulation).
  • Explore activities and comics to discover how we resist emotions, and how curiosity and acceptance can help us turn toward difficult emotions skillfully.
  • Hear real kids share their experiences throughout the book, helping kids understand that they are are not alone in their struggles.
  • Feel free to feel the full range of our emotions (including positive feelings!).
  • Treat ourselves like a good friend when things go wrong.
  • Wish kindness for ourselves and others.

So much goodness is packed into the first eight adventures of this quest. These are resilience resources that I wish for my own children, and for the world. These lessons are also part of my Parent-Child Mindfulness and Self-Compassion classes. If you have children ages 7-11, there’s still time to register for my next parent-child self-compassion class, which starts soon. Upcoming events also include a conversation with Kristin Neff as well as self-compassion courses and teacher training for adults.

Remember, your personal mindfulness and self-compassion practice matters. Not just for your well-being, but also because it ripples out to the world. I love this one-minute clip about how Grant’s self-compassion levels were profoundly influenced by his mom’s.

Wishing you acceptance and freedom on the path to well-being.

With love,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. Anjali and I made a video of the second comic from the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids, and we discussed why suppressing difficult emotions doesn’t work out well in the below clip:

Neff & Tatera Gathering

by | Sep 6, 2024 | Parenting, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

Special invitation code for upcoming event.

Hello Friends,

This coming Saturday, September 7, I’m speaking as a guest for Kristin Neff’s Self-Compassion Community, and Kristin gave me a free invitation code just for my mailing list (you!).

Kristin Neff is a pioneer in self-compassion research, and she co-created the Mindful Self-Compassion program that I teach. My Parent-Child Mindfulness and Self-Compassion class is an approved adaptation of Kristin’s MSC program. Kristin Neff is also a bestselling author of the books, Self-Compassion and Fierce Self-Compassion, and she has written the forward to my Mindfulness for Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids.

 

Jamie-Lynn as a guest for Kristin Neff’s Self-Compassion Community event.

I am honored to be a guest for her community, and I would be delighted if you are able to attend our talk. I will share about how we can help children grow self-compassion, and there will be Q & A time at the end.

If you’d like to join our talk on Saturday, you can register for no cost using this link (the page loads slowly, so give it a minute) https://self-compassion.org/event/conversation-with-jamie-lynn-tatera/. Click the button that says, “I already have an invitation code,” and then enter the invitation code Neff&Tatera2024 and checkout. You will receive the meeting link two days before the workshop, and there will also be a recording link if you cannot attend live.

Please let me know if you have any questions. My greatest wish is that we can keep spreading self-compassion to adults, children, teens, and families everywhere!

Wishing you light, love and joy,

Jamie Lynn

Finding Balance

by | Sep 6, 2024 | Mindfulness, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

Exploring the Healthy Mind Platter.

 

Hello Friends,

It’s back to school prep week for my kids. This week my work-life balance looks like 15 minute minutes of work followed by 2 hours of taking care of kids’ back to school needs. Repeat. Luckily, both girls are sleeping in right now as I write this newsletter.

As the school year approaches, I am thinking about balance. One of my favorite visuals for contemplating balance is the “Healthy Mind Platter.”

The Healthy Mind Platter.

The above image is a modified version of the original Healthy Mind Platter created by Daniel Siegel and David Rock. Sleep time, focus time, time-in, down time, physical time, play time, and connecting time all help to create a balanced mind and life. I’ve added the elements of nutrition and helping others, as I find those, too, to be critical elements of a healthy body and mind. Take a moment to pause and consider the platter. Which activities are receiving adequate attention? Which elements need more time/care?

When it comes to balance, there is a profound link between your body and your mind. My daughter and I just created another parent-child partner yoga video with a focus on balance. In the first couple of minutes we discuss balance in our lives, our bodies, and our nostrils (yes, we need balanced nostrils, too!!).

Practicing yoga postures and breathing practices is an important aspect of my personal healthy mind platter — it does so much to help to create balance in my life. I have a yoga and meditation class that I attend each week, and I also teach Mindful Yoga classes both in-person and online (new classes start in September). Mindful Yoga helps to create balance in my life by inviting me to move out of my head into my body. If you’d like to try it, I have Mindful Yoga videos for both adults and kids on my YouTube channel.

Exercise helps, too. I recently bought a used elliptical that I hop on between meetings. Swimming, dancing and walking with friends all help to bring me back to center. And I have mental “in the moment” practices, like sending kind wishes and repeating my mantra to help my mind stay centered in love.

What about you? How do you create balance in your life?

Wishing you light, love, and balance,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. Here’s a picture of me celebrating my Fierce Self-Compassion teacher training certification. I can’t wait to teach my first official Fierce Self-Compassion class this fall! I love Fierce Self-Compassion because it helps me find balance between tender compassion and strong action!!

Jamie-Lynn with Fierce Self-Compassion teacher training certification.