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Forgive Yourself

by | Apr 29, 2025 | Parenting, Parts of Ourselves, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

Dr. Chris Germer Helps us Release Parenting Shame

Hello friends,

The other day, I was on social media, and I saw this parenting post from the Institute of Child Psychology (please note my comment on the bottom of the post):

Parenting post from the Institute of Child Psychology and Jamie-Lynn's comment.

Of course yelling is not an optimal parenting (or teaching) strategy, and we don’t want to repeatedly berate our children and become an internalized inner critic. But if we pressure ourselves to be a perfect parent (or teacher), we won’t help our kids learn that it’s human to make mistakes. We all sometimes lose it as parents, and when we do, it’s an opportunity to forgive ourselves. We can acknowledge our mistakes and our humanity, and begin again.

Beating ourselves up when we fall short as caregivers is just as unhelpful as berating our children when they make mistakes. It’s not loving, and it’s not helpful. The alternative? Self-compassion.

Self-compassion is the antidote to shame, and today I am joyful to share a cherished interview with Dr. Christopher Germer. I originally recorded this interview for my Compassionate Parenting course, but I’m sharing it with you now as my last podcast episode of the season.

https://youtu.be/3ilIWwDNPok

Our interview includes a heart warming and insightful conversation along with a couple of short guided practices. It is so worth your time. Please listen to it.

And remember, no matter how imperfect you are, you can love yourself right now. Loving yourself amidst your imperfections will help you to own your mistakes, and it will also help you love your imperfect child. My own journey of self-acceptance has opened the doorway to truly accepting and loving my partner and my children as imperfect beings. And the more our family lovingly embraces each other amidst our imperfections, the more we have a sense of belonging in our family.

I must be honest, forgiving ourselves can be easier said than done. It took large doses of Mindful Self-Compassion training and years of practice to shift my habit of beating myself up, but the journey is so worth it! And self-compassion always meets us just where we are (see upcoming courses here).

So, please, forgive yourself for being imperfect, and begin (or continue) the journey of loving yourself. Remember to listen to my podcast episode with Chris Germer on your favorite podcast app. Just like self-love, it’s freely given to you.

Wishing you light and love,

Jamie Lynn

Releasing Parenting Shame with Dr. Chris Germer

JAMIE LYNN TATERA
APR 28

Do you struggle with forgiving yourself when you mess up as a parent? Do you hold yourself to unrealistic standards that you can never reach? Do you worry that you are going to unwittingly shame your child and damage them?

Read full story

Can We Stop a Child’s Meltdowns?

by | Apr 22, 2025 | Mindfulness, Parenting, Self-Compassion, Sensitive Children | 0 comments

And how self-compassion can help

Hello Friends,

Today I’m focusing on a common parenting challenge: Meltdowns. Whether a child is two or four, or sixteen, it can be extremely challenging to witness and stay calm when a child is melting down. And if we have a child that is neurodiverse or highly sensitive, the challenge can be even more acute.

It was my own daughter’s tantrums when she was 4 years old that brought me through the doorway of a therapist’s office and to self-compassion over a decade ago (I’ll share a blog on this soon).

A card saying that Tantrums can feel like too much for a parent to bear alone.

This card says so much! Tantrums can feel like too much for a parent to bear alone.

If you have a child who is sensitive or neurodiverse…

Kate Lynch is a mom and mindfulness coach who helps parents of neurodiverse children. She interviewed me last month for her podcast, and she also wrote an article that highlighted our conversation regarding how self-compassion can help in parenting sensitive and neurodiverse kids. If you have a child who is sensitive and/or neurodiverse, you will likely relate to much of our conversation.

You can read the article she wrote about our conversation regarding meltdowns here.

There’s so much goodness and common humanity in our conversation in the above article, and also in our interview below.

https://youtu.be/i9MA4OGpwSI

At around the 14:00 minute mark in the interview, I share my favorite self-compassion practice to use in the midst of a child’s meltdown and guide listeners through the practice of Breathing Compassion In and Out. Self-compassion can help both children and adults cope better and recover faster from a meltdown.

Back to the original question: Can we stop a child’s meltdown?

So you might be wondering about the whether or not we can stop a child’s tantrums. The answer is complex, because honestly, it depends.

And what does it depend on?

  • It depends on the temperament of your child (and you).

  • It depends on how well-connected you and your child are to one another.

  • It depends on how well-slept and well-fed your child (and you) are.

  • It depends on how many other difficult things you and your child have already coped with that day (this can be huge). In other words, how resilient and well-regulated do you and your child feel before the challenge arises?

  • And it depends on how many resources you and your child have for coping with challenges (like mindfulness and self-compassion)!

There are more things I could add to this list, but these are a few of the elements that can affect how much or how little influence we will have over whether our child’s unhappiness will result in a full-on meltdown on any given day.

Resources to cope with shame—it’s not your fault!

One of the emotions that can arise for a parent when their child has frequent meltdowns is shame. It’s so tempting to think that we are doing something wrong because we can’t tame our child’s outbursts. While it’s good to get curious about the factors in the last section, it’s massively unhelpful to assume that it’s “our fault” or that we are doing “something wrong” because our child has frequent meltdowns.

If you have a child with big emotions and lots of meltdowns, IT IS NOT YOUR FAULT. And, self-compassion can help.

Next week I’m excited to share an interview between myself and Chris Germer regarding self-compassion, shame, and parenting. It is my favorite interview…ever. So powerful. I can’t wait to share it with you because you deserve to know you are a GOOD parent, and how self-compassion can help you show up as your best self for your child, again…and again…and again.

Wishing you light and love,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. Here’s a picture of my girls at an Easter egg hunt at grandma and grandpa’s house. Even though they are 12 and 16, they still had fun with their cousins looking for eggs!

Egg hunt at Easter.

P.P.S. And here’s a picture of me, my beloved workbook, and one of the girl’s Easter bunnies.

Jamie-Lynn with the workbook and Easter bunny.

Thank you for being on this journey with me.

“I’m not like other kids”

by | Apr 15, 2025 | Jamie Lynn's Journey, Mindfulness, Parenting, Sensitive Children | 0 comments

Or is she!?

Hello Friends,

For the last few months I have been teaching Volume 2 of the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids to a neighbor’s daughter who sometimes struggles with anxiety. The other day when I came to teach her a lesson from the workbook she said to me, “I’m not like other kids, Jamie Lynn.”

“Why not?” I asked her. I expected that she was going to tell me something deeply troubling about herself, and I was prepared to meet whatever she said with compassion.

But she surprised me with her reply, “Because I actually want to do this workbook. I love the comics and all the lands, and I actually want to get this workbook when it comes out and do it again.”

A smile spread across my face, “You are like other kids,” I told her. “Other kids love the workbook, too.”

“Really?” she said.

“Yes,” I responded. “But that’s not common is it? Kids don’t usually love a workbook, do they?”

“No,” she replied. Then a look of realization came across her face, “That’s why you’re making this workbook! Because it’s a workbook that kids really want to do! We have to tell people so more people know!”

It was so sweet that it touched my heart, and I wanted to share. Children in diverse schools in Milwaukee and many of you who have emailed me about how your child loves the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids, Volume 1, know what my neighbor’s daughter just discovered—this is not your ordinary workbook!

My 8-year-old neighbor IS like other kids, but these workbooks are not like other workbooks. It’s so fun that kids don’t even realize that they are learning. But they are learning—so many great mindfulness and self-compassion skills. And this is how learning should be for children (and grown-ups!)—it should feel like play. The Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids, Volumes 1 and 2 make this aspiration a reality.

Jamie-Lynn holding Mindfulness and Self-Compassion workbook for Kids, Volume 1.

Note: Volume 2 will be released January 2026.

If you already know how much kids love these workbooks, please share about it with a friend or give the workbook a review to spread the word! And if you just learned this fun fact for the first time, get a copy of Volume 1 for a child that you care about. It’s a wonderful gift to give a child (or yourself).

Volume 1 is available on Amazon here, or you can support a local bookstore and buy it here.

Buy it locally

Thank you for being on this wondrous journey with me!

Love,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. My mom sent two mechanical, light up bunny rabbits to my daughters for Easter, and here they are playing with them. And yes, they are playing with their Easter rabbits in front of the Christmas nativity that I hadn’t taken down yet. But good news! I just put the nativity back in the attic ;).

Maya and Anjali are playing with Easter rabbits.

Compassion

by | Apr 10, 2025 | Parenting, Parts of Ourselves, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

Do you still judge this mom after you hear the whole story?

Hello Friends,

We oftentimes hear about difficult events in the news, but when it touches our lives personally, we feel it more deeply and the reality becomes more profound.

This past week I was teaching students mindfulness and self-compassion lessons at a school on the north side of Milwaukee. Kids love the lessons from my workbook for kids, but this particular day there was a handful of students in my first hour class who were having a rough time. Before I came in to teach, the first-grade teacher had called the mom of one of the students who had been misbehaving. As I began to teach my lesson, the mom came in, very dysregulated, and started cussing out her child for her misbehavior in front of the whole class. At this point you might be judging the mom, but wait until you hear the whole story in the below video before you judge. I hope the story moves your heart, just as it opened mine.

https://youtu.be/dF-6NuTCUu0

This is the poem that I share at the video’s end:

Compassion
By Miller Williams

Have compassion for everyone you meet, even if they don’t want it.
What appears bad manners,
an ill temper or cynicism is always a sign of things
no ears have heard, no ears have seen.
You do not know what wars are going on
down there where the spirit meets the bone.

The suffering that children experience is real. I wish there was more we could do to stop the harm, but I do know that bringing compassion and self-compassion to these kids’ classrooms can make a difference.

If you’d like to help self-compassion reach all children, especially children who need it the most, you can contribute to the fundraising effort to get the workbooks translated into Spanish.

Thank you for being on this journey with me.

Wishing you light and love,

Jamie Lynn

The Secret to Engaging Kids in Mindfulness

by | Apr 1, 2025 | Mindfulness, Parenting, Resilience, Self-Compassion | 0 comments

The Power of Curiosity

Hello Friends!

This week, I’m excited to share more about how to help kids (and ourselves) grow the resource of mindfulness. I get excited when I talk about how to best help children grow the resources of mindfulness and self-compassion. Why?

2 reasons:

  1. I know that Mindfulness and Self-Compassion helps kids (and grown-ups) A LOT with their mental health and overall well-being.
  2. I know how to help you make learning mindfulness and self-compassion FUN!

What could be more wonderful!?

Last month I shared about what mindfulness is, and how we can help kids practice Mindfulness (aka the “Spots” habit) more in daily life. Today I’d like to highlight a way that we can make mindfulness more fun for kids: invoke curiosity!

The Curiosity Exercise

When I teach my parent-child mindfulness and self-compassion class or work with kids in school, I bring a coconut oil box with a little chick hidden inside for our first lesson. I tell children that I have something small, soft and yellow inside the box, and I invite them to guess what it is.

Kids eagerly raise their hands, and I ask them if they feel curious. When they say, “Yes!” I invite them to notice what curiosity feels like in their body.

After a series of guesses, I open the box and out comes “Curi,” my curiosity chick. Curi the curious chick appears in all of the comics throughout my workbooks for kids, and accompanies the classes and kids through mindfulness and self-compassion lessons. Curi helps us be curious about our feelings, thoughts, and five senses.

Cultivate curiosity.

Curiosity is the secret to teaching kids mindfulness. Without it, mindfulness feels like a chore, but with it, mindfulness feels interesting and even fun.

Playful ways to practice mindfulness—Find the ant!

Something else that appears throughout all the comics in my books is a little ant named Anty. Anty is shy, so she is hidden in every comic. Looking for Anty engages kids and makes learning fun.

You can look back at a couple of workbook comics I’ve shared here and here, and try to find the ant.

When kids are looking for ants, they are seeing on purpose (practicing mindfulness). But they don’t even realize it because curiosity drives their engagement.

Here’s a page from the Land of Mindfulness in Volume 1 of the Mindfulness and Self-Compassion Workbook for Kids that helps kids become conscious of the power of curiosity.

Curiosity is a Superpower

Did you find all ten ants? Notice how easy it is to focus when you’re curious 🙂

I have two more playful mindfulness ideas to share, but I don’t want to make this newsletter too long, so I’ll save them for a future newsletter.

As a reminder, the playful comics and characters are also a part of my parent-child Mindfulness and Self-Compassion class. You can learn more about my parent-child class here.

Next class starts April 28

I appreciate your curiosity and interest in helping kids (and yourself) grow the resources of mindfulness and self-compassion.

Wishing you curiosity and love,

Jamie Lynn

P.S. My daughters and their friend performed at an open mic night last week at a local inn. I feel prateful (proud and grateful) for my girls’ courage and talent!

Maya and Anjali performing music.

P.P.S. On Sunday I shared some thoughts and pictures from our (imperfect) family vacation. My blog and short video for paid subscribers included imperfect vacation highlights as well as how embracing imperfection can help us all open to beauty.

March Newsletter: My Vacation View.

Thank you for being on this journey with me.♥️